Written By Tracy Litt, Mindset & Self-Love Expert
So, how’d you do?
There is only one day left in 2018. So, how’d you do?
How’d you do on the resolutions you set? The new decisions you made? The proclamations of the new you, the growth in your business, the love in your relationships, the release of resentment, stress and negativity?
Whatever your answer is, it’s all good. We’re simply collecting data, not making judgements. You aren’t allowed to beat yourself up or choose to rub yourself down in guilt for not being where you wanted to be. Being mean to yourself only makes it harder to create what you want.
Never fear, I’m here.
It’s not uncommon to fall short of resolutions. Did you know that 80% of New Year’s Resolutions fail by February?! I know, it’s crazy. That doesn’t mean it’s not possible. It simply means you need to understand what it really takes to make shit happen. And fortunately for you, that’s exactly what this conversation is all about.
Step 1: Intention.
One of the reasons that goals fall short is because there is no emotional and energetic connection to the feeling you will obtain when reaching the goal. That’s where setting intentions come in.
An intention is the thought and energy behind the goal, behind the thing you want. It’s your ability to connect to how you will feel when that goal is realized. That feeling, that ability to experience the goal as if it’s already here, is what pulls you through and keeps you moving toward it.
Here’s the format for a powerful intention:
I feel ______________________ now that ___________________________________________.
Let’s say you goal is to be more visible in your business, so it grows.
Intention may be: I feel so excited, proud and confident now that I am visible and showing up in my growing business.
If your goal is to be less negative and stressed out.
Intention may be: I feel so calm, peaceful and present now that I am aware of myself and not giving my energy away to what doesn’t serve me.
Your intention is what carries you through the moments when you don’t feel like it or when you want to stop. Read your intentions daily.
Step 2: Alignment:
To create what you want, you must be in alignment with it.
This means releasing anything that is blocking you or not congruent with your intention. There are external and internal components to alignment.
External: your environment, physical clutter, disorganization, toxic people, commitments outside of you.
Internal: limiting beliefs, limiting thoughts, self-doubt, mindset, resentments.
Ask yourself: What am I tolerating? What or who is stealing my energy? What do I need to let go of?
A great hack to identify your internal blocks is to state your powerful intention out loud, the be quiet and listen to what your inner voices say. All of that doubt and all of those reasons why, are your internal blocks.
Example: Read the intention we created above. I feel so excited, proud and confident now that I am visible and showing up in my growing business.
And your thoughts say: Who do you think you are? Huge success is not for you. What if they don’t like you? What if no one watches your live? You’re not good enough. Those are your limiting beliefs and limiting thoughts.
Once you’ve identified them, you get to reframe them, choose new thoughts and new beliefs that support the intention.
Step 3: Take Action
Nothing happens without action. You can wish, hope, pray, manifest and intend until your blue in the face. Without action, you’ll get nowhere.
The trick to action is to take small actions along the way. Steadily and consistently moving the ball down the field. If you attempt huge, grandiose action, you’ll trip your comfort zone wire, flip your mind out and before you know it, you’ll be back on the couch doing nothing.
Taking small, incremental action allows you to create your own motivation and gain momentum, all while building your self-esteem.
So, consider your intention. Then ask yourself, what are 2-3 small actions I can take toward making this intention a reality?
Then get off your ass and do them.
Step 4: Focus & Attention
Where your attention goes, your energy flows. What you look for is what you see, 100% of the time.
You want to consciously place your focus and attention on what you are calling in, on what you are creating.
You want to choose thoughts and language that are powerful and in support of what you want. Instead of putting your focus and attention on not having it or on what you don’t want.
Think of the last chat you had with a friend. When they asked, “How are you? What’s going on?” What did you say?
Did you reply in support of where you’re going and how excited you are to feel how you want to feel or create your dreams? Or did you talk about how hard it is, how it’s not happening fast enough? Did you complain and bitch? What “story” were you telling?
Because the story you tell is where you are placing your focus and attention. If your focus and attention isn’t congruent to what you want, you’ll never get there.
Step 5: Love Yourself
Self-Love IS your superpower. To love yourself is to empower yourself.
When you love yourself, you will make the choices that serve you, that will support you in creating what you want, because you know you are enough and you know you deserve nothing less than everything you’ve ever dreamt of.
Here’s the truth: You are worthy. You are enough. It’s your birthright.
Self-love is a deep and broad topic, the best thing you can do right now and continue to practice is self-compassion.
It’s treating yourself as your own BFF. It’s being gently and loving toward yourself, instead of beating yourself up and being critical.
When you are working towards your goals and intentions, and you make a mistake or you have a misstep, be loving toward yourself. Show yourself compassion and be tender, be supportive, be encouraging.
Your relationship with yourself is the most important relationship of your life. Act accordingly.
This is how you make shit happen. Follow the steps. Choose yourself and this time next year, you’ll be exactly where you wanted to be and beyond.